I HATE BLONDE

I REFUSE to believe that“LINDSANITY” is about anything other than Lindsay Lohan. (I know, this is a #whitegirlproblem). OH, and those are my business cards, bitches. 

(P.S. My Dad LOVES them.)

Taking this week to rest might be the smartest thing I’ve ever done… but I can’t take creds for it. I’ve got a dope-ass family that really cares about me, and they MADE me stay with them all week long. Haha! I haven’t seen them since my short visit over christmas break & I’ve got to say, not seeing them AT LEAST once a month is probably going to be the biggest mistake of my life (if i don’t change it now!!) My house-hold is crazy, with four kids + multiple foster-kids (some I just met for the first time this weekend!), loud-ass gangster music blasting through all four floors (sometimes Drake in the basement and Wayne upstairs…), endless pizza boxes that get devoured in seconds in the kitchen & a laundry room full of so many clothes that I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna get the shit back that I threw down there…. but my parents are seriously the strongest and most self-less people I know, supporting copious amounts of needy and obnoxious youth.

Being home makes me realize I need to rely less on them. I need to stop asking for  money, plane tickets and starbucks gift cards… and just do shit myself. I’ve realized now that if it came down it to, I would work my ASS-OFF to put myself through the rest of my degree and then med-school/law-school. I’ve been given so much, and I need to do more with it.

If you’ve got a family/been adopted into one… give them some creds & love this weekend ; )

I’m not Snow-White, but I’m lost inside this forest. I’m not Red Ridding Hood, but I think the wolves have got me. Don’t want the stilettos, I’m not Cinderella. I don’t need a knight, so baby, take off all your armor.

You be the Beast and I’ll be the Beauty, Who needs true love as long as you love me truly? I want it all, but I want you more. Will you wake me up if I bite your poison apple?

I don’t believe in fairytales.

photos: © Claudia Susana

I know… It’s Monday… And I’m staying in bed… you should too. After fashion week & all this LINSANITY, we all need a rest. Skip your morning latte and opt for breakfast in bed. This morning I cuddled in bed over peanut butter waffles and an episode of my little pony. Can we say perfect morning? I was swooped off to the doctors a little bit later. The doctor called me princess & gave me pink band-aids to put over my arms where they drew blood. Now I’m back in bed in my  little orange nighties (looking like an ad for PINK ) & invading the on-demand with a cup of hot coco.

Looks like it’s going to be a promising day of much needed beauty rest, I hope TO GOD,  you’re doing the same. (Avoid early wrinkles & take care of yourself!)

Being sick allows for ample time to shop online. With that being said, It started friday with ordering the leopard print hellraisers (#DYING), then continued with my mom and I crushing over silk lingerie (#CHECK), and ended with me ordering  two new wildfox swimsuits, cropped wildfox tee’s & kreepsville 666 skull jewelry.

Needless to say, I’m still lurking the web for more president’s day steals & feeling WAAAY too tempted to also order the black hellraisers (#RAINBOW LACES DUH!)…

But anyways, I’m sorry for being sick my little internet unicorns! The Barbie Editorial (Shot by Kiara Jade) will still release this week. And I hope you spend tomorrow, President’s Day, the right way with much needed RETAIL THERAPY!! My mom and I will be hitting Victoria Secret & MAC with iced americano’s in our hands & heels on our feet.

I’m still recovering, most likely going to take this week off of school, but thank you for all your sweet emails, facebook messages, and twitter posts <3

Personally, I’m a little bit disappointed in Obama for taking back the right for all women to receive free birth control through insurance, even if they work at a Catholic institution. Seriously GOP, we’re not living in some 50′s micro-wave dinner, flower sofa fantasy-land, this is 2012 & women deserve safe and worry-free sex.

How could one even say that making a Catholic institution give out free birth control is an infringement on their “religious freedom” ???? It should be provided for free regardless of the Jesuit/Muslim/Catholic/Christian/Mormon/Sea-Horse title on the college. It is up to THE WOMEN if she wants to take it or not. You can still work at a religious university and chose not to take the free birth control… The point is, the option should be there. You say an infringement on “Religious Freedom?” How  about I say, an infringement on WOMEN’S RIGHTS.

How do I always end up looking like a unicorn? Aside from my bodysuits, I’ve been a slaaaave to UNIF & it’s trashy tees and kicks. But I can’t dress like a dirty #warriorprincess all the time… This weekend I’m taking cues from Jeremy Scott’s new ready to wear collection: Neon nails, stuffed animals as purses, beaded eye tattoos, ice blue lips and iconic rhetoric rainbow clothing.

Wait.. maybe this is the exact same thing… just with color…. ANYWAYS! These photos were taken last weekend with my fellow Rachel before we went out to the gallery showing of our good friend, Justin. Rachel frequents the city in her classic non-campbell creepers and constantly changing hair color. She always manages to dress up an edgy look with a classy piece from Marc Jacobs.

Speaking of Marc Jacobs… DID YOU SEE THE SQUASHY FUR HATS IN HIS NEW COLLECTION!? If you haven’t, you should. They are entirely too fun and inspiring to pass up. We all need to get our shit together and hide under one of these big pieces of fabulous! #SERIOUSLY

magical xoxo,

#mylittlerachels

baby macHappy Valentine’s Day Hoes! You probably don’t have as many boyfriend as me this holiday… but it’s nothing to be sad about. Less boyfriends = less people you have to make time for. I hope you’ve got today filled with cards, toys and candies (not too much candy… the idea is what counts on this one.) (REMEMBER: Chocolates look a lot cuter the in the box then they do on your thighs.) But I DO recommend Pink Champagne. If you can’t afford that, Trader Joe has some cute pink moscato on sale today for $5. (Your bitch will think you’re cheap… but she’ll get the point. ) If you’re where it’s cold out, grab a pink bottle and have a cozy night in <3 #romantic #netflixlifestyle….. But if you’re a barbie doll & have more than one valentine…. you need to take all your men to the most expensive hotel club & dress like pink foxes. Lick lollypops (no #fat) & enjoy being with the ones you love… #gay #straight #bi #unicorn  or #panda !!

suck on that, bitches

xo

I know… It’s Monday. And I will be dressing like a magical blonde stoner unicorn to deal w/ it. HOW does one dress like a magical blonde stoner unicorn you may ask? Well first you’ve got to get out of bed (no really, you must…) & don’t brush your hair… I repeat.. DON’T brush that beautiful mane of golden locks. Instead, throw a black beanie over it. Then throw on your UNIF magical mushroom rainbow tye-dye long tee-shirt as a dress & pair it with the dolce vita harness boots. Maybe put a little mascara on those lashes & some pink rouge on those cheeks, but not too much makeup, you want people to think you actually just magically got out of bed this way… (which you pretty much did!) All you need was a little boost from the tiny blonde in rainbow!

xoxo & I love you guys, let’s do this!

R. Lynch

It’s true, we girls really are magical. With rosebud soft lips, we’ve inspired generations of heartbreak.

With that being said, Have you decided who’s life you’re going to ruin this Valentine’s day? It’s the perfect holiday to be beautiful and break hearts. Wax your brows, get a manicure, fake lashes  and a really fitted dress that shows off your Pilates body and the rest is heartbreak.

I’M KIDDING!!!….. Sort of… Haha, anyways! I hope you’re all celebrating this weekend as much as I am! Currently painting my nails neon yellow and putting pink in my hair, getting ready for a Valentine’s day party tonight! I’ve got to finish making these Disney Princess Valentines for everyone before I go…

Love & Kisses Bitches,

R. Lynch